I have been asked this question quite often in the last month or so.
Having spent almost a decade away from India, one can find a zillion things to complain about India. But there needs to be a clarity of perspective. There is no point comparing a 62-year-old country to those that have existed as nations for hundreds of years.
Their institutions and public conduct have shaped up over many centuries, while India is quite early in that journey.
Why are the politicians so corrupt? Why is the judiciary too keen on green vehicles and clean drains when there is hundreds of years of backlog in their own work? Why don't the bureaucrats plan for the countries future? Why does media plant products and panic in public pysche instead of informing/educating them? Why do the companies charge western prices for pretty poor services? Questions like these arise in my mind, but don't bother me much.
Despite the problems, India is a thriving democracy; has independent and active judiciary; has a growing economy; a super-competitive media market and companies creating local products that can match up to their interational competitors.
But the one thing that bothers me - and others in a similar situation too - is a lack of straight-forwardness. Or too much politeness, according to my friends.
The other evening a family friend had come to my parents' place. In the course of the conversation, she said, "It is my grand-daughter's birthday this evening. All of you must come".
My instant reaction was, "No, aunty. I have already committed to someone in the evening. I won't be able to make it".
She seemed to ignore my response. "They are saying they'll try to come to the party," she told her husband.
I felt bad. Maybe I was too rude. Maybe I should have just said, "I will try, but cannot be sure".
That's how interactions are here. My landlady promised a furnished house "with whatever stuff you like". But when we moved, in a week later, the house was bare. "I was waiting for you to come and specify what you wanted". But we did tell you what we wanted. A double-bed for us to sleep in. Another one for family or friends visiting us. A sofa to seat people in the living room. "Don't worry. Everything will be done this week".
A week later. "What to do? There is a strike in Kashmir. No transporters are bringing any stuff from there". No, there is no state-wide strike. The strike only affects a small town which isn't where you said the stuff was coming from.
Two weeks later. "I haven't been able to speak to the supplier. You know they have banned mobile phones in Kashmir". No, they haven't. They have only banned the issuing of new pre-paid mobile connections.
The same applies for hired help. A promise to "take the measurements"or "check the washing machine" or "sort out the leak" at 10.00 am turns into a day-long wait. "What to do, sir? Lots of traffic on the road today. And there was an accident that held everyone up".
Sure, but you do carry a mobile phone and could have called up. "I could. But then, I didn't think it would take this long". What? For a full two-hours after your promised arrival?
At the bank, "the cashier has gone to the toilet" and "will be back in five minutes". But there is no sign of him/her for a good half-hour.
Friends too are "just 10 minutes away", when actually they would have just set out on the hour-long drive to your place.
Sometimes, we think it is unreasonable to get irked about these things. But then there is almost no value of time - either your's or the other person's. To a lot of such people, it just seems like what the fuss is all about. What is a few hours in a day? And what is a few days in a week?
But add up those hours and days and suddenly you reach a frightening number. The concept of Indian Stretchable Time is good as a joke, but by God it expects you to pay a big price if you practice it.
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